Blogical Perceptions

Bangalore

noreply@blogger.com (Varadarajan) — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 17:54:00 +0000

Bengaluru 2020

Conductor: Ticket! Ticket! Ticket!
Passenger: Madiwala gea eradu ticket kodi
Conductor: Sir, It’s really happy to see someone speaking Kannada here
Passenger: No! I’m not a native Kannada speaker. I’m a Madrasi. I live in Bengaluru from my childhood. I learnt Kannada here.
Conductor: ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
(Conductor longs for someone to speak Kannada)

Bengaluru 2050

Passenger: Conductor, e bus madiwala hogutha!
Conductor: Kya?
Passenger: e bus madiwala hogutha!
Conductor: Sorry, I don’t get you.
Passenger: Erdu madiwala kodu pa!
Conductor: Do u know any other language except Kannada? May be Tamil, Hindi, Telugu, Malayalam or at least English? Coz I don’t understand Kannada
Passenger: nevu ean helthaidhira
Conductor: Excuse me; Can anybody translate what this villager is speaking?
Passenger 2: I don’t get him either. Btw, Conductor Sir, which place are u from??
Conductor: I’m a native Bangalorean
Passenger 2: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Not even a conductor this time)

A Song in Sydney

noreply@blogger.com (Varadarajan) — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 12:07:00 +0000

(This blog dates back to January)

The Sydney Cricket Ground as rightly told by Ian Chappell was the only place where the Indian think-tank could have beaten the kangaroos. The Sydney wicket prepared for the contest was so special, that it provided 5 days of noteworthy cricket as what it was not some 10 or 15 years back. The curator deserves accolades; to get a result on the last day with about some minutes barely left must be a curator's dream.

Of Sledging:
The game scaled new height that it involved more than 11 players for the Aussies to pull off a dramatic contest and rewrite history. Australia as a part of their game perfects their invention- Sledging. Very few of their players remain nonchalant while most of them go short in believing their potential when things doesn't go their way. They've made it a compulsive element that even the 20nodd cameras capturing them live couldn't stop them from doing it. It'll remain dominant in every cricket match until the captain comes to the fore, preaches his boys on their behavior. Its absolutely unhealthy considering the growing popularity of cricket. Its high time for the ICC to put a bridle on this fast spreading pathogen.

Of Umpiring Errors:
It still remains obscure among the cricket fans about what to be referred to the third-umpire and what not. But one fact, the people are certain with- it shouldn't be referred to the players. Ricky ponting usually demands decisions, pressurizing umpires. He yells false disappointment on appeals turned down against him, kicks the ground, gazes the batsman and does all sorts of non sense. I wonder what the poor punter would decide when he is asked to judge his own catch. He isn't Jesus Christ. Is He ?? The Umpire wouldn't have lost a penny on referring it to the third umpire.

Ponting's aggression and attitude fails to strike a right balance and its been proved time and again. Awfully, talented youngsters like Michael Clarke get inspired from his captain. The match never seemed to be India's when the benefit of doubt were given to the Aussies. Andrew Symonds who hardly gives a chance, survived many crucial calls and went on to score a match winning 148 to earmark a page in the history books. A Simple apology from the umpire's part would do it all for the ICC. However, the pages can't be torn from the books.

P.S: In case you are unable to differentiate Australian players and umpires in this match then you have simple clue. Those wearing black trousers are umpires and those wearing green caps are Aussies.

The New Volvo-MTC bus

noreply@blogger.com (Varadarajan) — Tue, 01 Jan 2008 13:58:00 +0000

It was a fine evening (month’s beginning) and my wallet had enough to do the talking. So I stepped into the 'New Volvo MTC bus'-one which I had been longing since its roll out. Man what a sight it was. Felt like something that was at all times felt visionary came into existence.

Some admirable features which we never imagined seeing in a MTC bus were,

1) A/C – Each seated passenger has individual ducts. It’s going to be ur travel-haven during the summer.
2) 2- Cameras (Rear and Front) and LCD screens for them. The driver has no problems.
3) Complete electronic control for the driver (He dresses like a pilot-good. But speaks local Tamil *gasps*)
4) It looked disabled-friendly. One end was low-floored and the other was a controlled protrusive ramp. Alleviative for already struggling handicapped and elders.
5) One half of the bus had seats that were ramp just as in a theatre. It was a nice feeling I tell u.
6) Smooth & swift. Very less noise.
7) Last but not the least – The CD player was playing soothing ‘Ilayaraja’ melodies with speakers all over the bus.

The fare is justified against the facilities MTC offers in its Volvo line of buses. But a common man needs to pay through his Nose. I was charged 2.5 times the normal charge. The MTC can introduce season tickets to attract passengers in the lean hours too. It runs empty sometimes.

P.S. I would have missed some features too. I gave my best to note down those, but then I was unable to stay awake for a longtime inside the bus. I badly needed a blanket-Its December. Finally the conductor shouted ‘Thambi enchirppa Tambaram vandudichi’ (Get up kiddo, we’ve reached Tambaram).

My Top 3 of 2007

noreply@blogger.com (Varadarajan) — Sun, 30 Dec 2007 15:11:00 +0000

Here's my Top 3 list of 2007.

Mozhi
Paruthi Veeran
Chennai 600028

P.S. There are some movies which I'm yet to see. Perhaps, they may head the list if i had seen. Evano oruvan, katradu thamizh to name some.

Lage Raho Munnabhai- A Tribute to 'Mahatma'

noreply@blogger.com (Varadarajan) — Sun, 23 Dec 2007 17:31:00 +0000

* Where on earth could I see one like this *

I took to watch the film late after much hype where expectation was going out of bounds. But it was treated with a feast of marvelous film making. Rajkumar Hirani revisits the streets of the Bombay-goons munna and circuit to deliver an exemplary successor. A first-of-its-kind for sanjay dutt and not everyday in Indian cinema u get to see films of this type.

Its evident in each frame of the film, the director had taken pains to carve a tight script in which emotion and comedy were seen on one eye each. That's probably where the director succeeds and had won hearts. Arshad Warsi is brilliant and matches up with sanjaydutt in every damn thing- He does tat so easily. The ravishing Vidya balan was never short of charm and her acting just gets better with each film.

There is one instance where Arshad Warsi cries when his 'bhai' slaps him and the same night the goons engage in emotional exchanges. This is one among the few places where the director was tested in binding the 2 major parts of the film-Bully-ism, Gandhism. Well he succeeds with ease (Watch out for the dialogues in this scene). Also munna says ‘if everybody starts practicing Gandhigiri then the lawyers would never find their bread and butter’. That was too good a one-liner to explain the film’s theme. Boman Irani’s ripe in acting was substantial to the film’s success. One cannot complain about the songs or the picturization either. It strikes a right balance with the script. Everything about this film works.

A respite to Hindi film making which has seen Karan johar, aditya chopra stereotypes the khan's dancing in moonlight, the same love story, different screenplay and different heroine. Just for the heck of standing on a critic’s shoe I would say: The director was seen stumbling for the film once went too preachy and when Arshad Warsi was apparently missing. Also the script had too many scenes tat were just visionary. Nonetheless, for too many good things in it 'Lage raho Munnabhai' catches the hearts of al ages and classes with the mindblowing humor and the heartwarming sentiment. Just takes me to say 'Lage raho Munnabhai....'there is no one to stop you...,

P.S: Only few good films occur in Indian cinema. Make hay while the sun shines. Don’t ever dare to miss this. As I told earlier ‘not everyday in Indian cinema u get to see films of this kind’ and be on the watch for the Lage raho trilogy…

Simbu’s New release- Jodi No.1 (Season 2)

noreply@blogger.com (Varadarajan) — Sun, 18 Nov 2007 13:18:00 +0000

Here’s my review on simbu’s new film:
Man wat a performance. I never knew simbu could act that well. It was extremely good. It’s astonishing to see someone who had made the audience cry all these years with his horrible performance, crying (Kamalji, sorry I give 2nd place to Nayakan). The vijay tv cameraman was dumbstruck with such a performance. Call sheets has been on queue for simbu after tat. 'Simbu pl tel me wat is der 2 cry' especially when one pair did a good performance today, I saw u tried something again. I still wonder. Ypur movies were reviewed so badly, but u never cared and kept delivering the same non sense. But one thing, it was really happy to see himself admitting ‘Enak saththiyama nadikka theriyadu’.

This is 'Chennai' for you

noreply@blogger.com (Varadarajan) — Wed, 07 Nov 2007 07:58:00 +0000

It was a sunny evening. I was on my way back home from Tnagar ofcourse in bike. Just for a moment I felt proud abt myself. For, I attracted the attention of everybody standing near a signal. I dint perform a skit, I never had a mic, der wasn't a mishap either. Guess what i did, I just stopped in a signal while it was showing 'red' perhaps when everybody else went evading (We are supposed 2 stop der isnt it ?). Is tat such a strange sight for the ppl around? A Govt bus driver kept looking at me fixedly til he went past atleast 10m ahead. I m happy my foto wasnt flashed in the next day's 'dinathandhi'.
Hats Off ChennaIteS......you made me proud :):)

Say 'No' to Crackers.....

noreply@blogger.com (Varadarajan) — Tue, 06 Nov 2007 18:27:00 +0000

Hi …
Just 2 mins n I ll leav u..,
As we all r heading 2wards the most awaited festival in our calender, we keep track on the TV programs 4 that day (Luk out for the much celebrated and awaited new film on the small screen).

Yes, I m talking about ‘deepavali’…The festival of lights redefined over the years to ‘festival of crackers’. Show me one house in south India where u see lights lit on a deepavali day??? Impossible..U cud hear the sound of crackers even if u run away for that day to Mars.
Wel as literates we need 2 think abt the adverse impacts of burning crackers. More than pollution the sudden explosive sound can be a ‘deathblow’. Imagine the state of a new born baby, smal kid or elders for that matter hearing a sudden 145dB explosion *yuck* (Just take a minute 2 perceive dis).

The SC has actually banned the production of crackers above 120dB(Some say 125dB.,) but crackers hitting the market these days aren’t less than 140dB., The manufacturers r also supposed 2 disclose the facts abt the composition of their product, the sound level wen fired etc etc but they fail to do so. The onus lies on us to understand these obscure facts and act accordingly. If we start inculcating this to our kids at least by now, we are about to save our next generation from this growing threat.
Expecting at least a minimal response from u not in the form of comments, but in action, here’s wishing u a ‘happy and safe deepavali’ in advance…thanks 4 spending ur valuable time…
Post Script: I recommend those colorful nighttime skiers to those bloody horrible crackers. You know, we are at least sound-free if not pollution-free and we are nothing short of a real good fun and amusement at the same time.

Right to blasphemy !

noreply@blogger.com (Varadarajan) — Tue, 09 Oct 2007 18:54:00 +0000

An amendment to the Constitutional rights of India - ‘Right to blasphemy’. Pondering what??? Of course I m sarcastic here!! I recently had a stroll down the street of my local market. In my way I was intervened by some profane language seemed somebody was scolding someone in front of a microphone amplifying his voice. There was a considerable crowd, vehicular movements was obstructed. As usual it was a party pubic address.

It’s the ever famous Dravida kazahagam this time. The victim was lord Ram sadly. Rama, Valmiki, Sita, laxman all the epical names were revived for all wrong reasons. Sita’s chastity was questioned. Just for a moment I thought there was an amendment to the Indian Constitutional rights in the name of ‘Right to blasphemy’.

It was evident from his speech tat he had clearly went only through the page numbers of ramayana and nothing else. Being in a democratic country whose name (Hindustan) is supposed to have derived from its people, don’t we expect the religious sentiments of the people to be respected. I spent some 20mins time to observe what they were up to. But at the end felt I was standing amidst a bunch of ruffians who were assuming them Russians.

“Oh dear atheist elders, so pity of u, communism is different. They have principles and atheism is one among them. It has a different meaning altogether. Show me ur party’s principle, policy and ur recent role in the Tamilnadu politics other than to sing the tunes of MK at the top your voices “.

They claim themselves the follower of E.V.R who found almighty in his pure-heart helping ways and for whom i would reckon atheism is not at all a bad principle. Though he was denouncing the Hindu gods, he was actively involved in eroding the caste system, superstitious beliefs among people thro non violent ways and fought his way for women liberation, education for poor and much more. After his demise the party broke up and gave birth to a many Dravidian parties viz DMK, AIADMK..,But then DK is yet to find its plot in the Tamilnadu politics after EVR.

There was a huge flock of ppl congregated and were properly instructed to clap hands for every 4mins for just a mouthful of dinner may be. Police bandobust was also provided for this crap. My literates, where are we heading to?

49-O Right to no(ugh)t vote

noreply@blogger.com (Varadarajan) — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 07:59:00 +0000

Hi all,
Please take some time to read this entire post. Hope many of you wud hav heard abt dis during the elections but the most important clause of this 49-O goes unilluminated more woefully even by the media which is supposed to be the biggest impediment for any collusive act taking place during elections.,

"Accroding to the Conduct of Elections 1961, which governs the Elections taking place in India, If a valid voter has dislike to all the candidates competing his constituency, then he/she can opt for registering 49'O, which signifies the vote being cast but to nobody". By doing this the voter can exercise to prevent electoral fraud, and misuse of his/her vote."
And as a consequence:-
Some recent articles suggest that in case the number of votes recorded under Section 49-O is greater than the maximum number of votes polled in favour of any of the candidates, a repoll is held. Nonetheless dis is not explicitly mentioned in any of the sections of 'The Conduct of Elections Rules, 1961'

More than all, the shameful fact is, this 49'O is available ever since 1960, but it is in no way conveyed to the people. Neither the government communicate this, nor did the election commission.

So ur valubale vote is not restricted to the limited idiotic pigs competing der.,It has even a little more value wen its not cast for anyone under compulsion.,Do ask for 49-O if at al u find ur wards dissatisfactory.,der r ofcourse some other section namely 49-N, 49-P whic is not of much importance to us..,

REMEMBER UR VOTE IS VALUABLE !! ONE VOTE IS ALL ENUF 2 MAKE A DIFFERENT/DIFFERNCE(in) GOVT.......

Ask ur Govt !!

noreply@blogger.com (Varadarajan) — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 19:02:00 +0000

Dear ppl,
As all of u wud have heard the election promises of the Govt, a color TV, Rice @ Rs.2/Kg was promised .. Wen a Govt is able to give an entertaining idiot box for free y cant the same govt give a life saving helmet without cost... The knack of the Govt actually lies in exploiting the negligence of the literate.,So it ll continue to be so as long as we literates stay dormant.,Pl do forward messages r e-mails related to these things so tat some of our perceptions might be put into ppl's eyes for a go-through..,

Pakistan & USA.........

noreply@blogger.com (Varadarajan) — Tue, 25 Sep 2007 18:36:00 +0000

Hi.,
I recently got a superb mail explaining the hostility between USA and Pakistan., Comprising only a few lines it almost says everything.,just brilliant.,
(thought of telling 'Its a forward mail n not hand-typed by me)

Musharraf calls Bush on 11th sept:

Musharraf: Mr President, I would like to express my condolences to you. It is a real tragedy. So many
people, such great buildings... I would like to ensure that we had nothing in connection with that..
Bush: What buildings? What people??
Musharraf: Oh, and what time is it in America now?
Bush: It ' s eight in the morning.
Musharraf: Oops...Will call back in an hour!